Grandmother Doggett

Since I met her, I called Mary Madeline Doggett "Grandmother". Even before Jeremy and I were married, she treated me as one of the family. Maybe it was because my Grandma died when I was 11 and my Gram lived across the country or maybe we were just kindred spirits and big fans of one handsome young man named Jeremy Doggett, but for some reason I grabbed onto this sweet lady and held on tight!

Grandmother always reminded me of ladies in my family and was one of the hardest working, strongest women I ever met. She liked to garden, cook, sew and loved Jesus. Grandmother would do anything for anyone and was always checking in on everyone to make sure they were doing ok. She had such a sweet spirit, an easy smile that lit up her eyes, and she loved to laugh. She also dressed like my Grandma when she was just working around the house for the day. Functional, not to impress. She often wore long sleeved, button-up shirts and pants or shorts that didn't match. I loved her for it and felt right at home at her house.

This sweet lady loved my family, too. She would send my mom cards and always asked how everyone back home was doing. She also seemed to sense things I was thinking but never said out loud. She knew I was homesick after getting married and moving. She always, always, always supported my need to visit home. This may have been because she, too, was very close to her parents and family. When others would comment about how often Jeremy and I visited Martin, Grandmother would always just say, "Have a good trip. Tell them all we said 'hello'!" Then, she would always want to know all about our trip when we got back and ask about every member of my family. She never said a negative word about it. I always appreciated that, even though I never told her.

Grandmother mentored me in growing plants, canning and sewing. She gave me tips and tricks just like my own grandmothers would. I will never forget the day she and Granddaddy (Jeremy's grandfather) came over to teach us to can tomatoes. Granddaddy sat himself at the kitchen table with the newspaper to "oversee" the process and Grandmother went straight to work teaching. I had always been scared of pressure cookers/canners, so I was thrilled to have an expert showing us the ropes. She was patient and laughed alot at our antics in the kitchen. I made Jeremy take the lid off the canner when it had cooled, and as we all stood there watching, Granddaddy said, "BOOM!" and started chuckling. She just shook her head and rolled her eyes as he said, "I wished I could have lit a firecracker when he did that." I thought we were all going to have a heart attack! Us from the surprise and him from getting so tickled at himself. A few weeks later she shared with me a process she has learned about how to can in the oven. We both tried it with good results, and a little less stress from jokers...haha. I think about her every time we plant, pick or can tomatoes and hope I can remember everything she taught me.

Grandmother was active at church and the semi-annual church singing held in her home community. She loved visiting with her old friends and making new ones, sharing stories and recipes with them all. Everyone who met her loved her. The small country church she and Granddaddy attended rotates preachers every week. Jeremy preaches there once a month. The average attendance is a dozen or so people. One Sunday while in the middle of a sermon, Grandmother asked Jeremy a question about when he was saying. We were dumbfounded. It was a question about what he was saying, but still I thought the church might collapse all around us. I had never heard anyone ask the preacher a question during a sermon! She acted like it was no big deal. Jeremy was rattled a bit, but never showed it. He simply responded to her and went right on with the sermon. Afterward, he and I got a good laugh about it. We still talk about that day and chuckle.

One Winter, Jeremy and I planned to attend a good old fashioned hog killin'. Upon learning we were planning to participate, Grandmother asked if we could bring back some brains, four feet and a hog head. She wanted to make souse. Yuck! I mean....that was nice. haha. Jeremy was excited. He loves homemade souse. So, we brought it all home, and she taught Jeremy how to make souse. He was in hog heaven. It is such a great memory for him, and I'm so glad she was able to teach him...even though I still won't eat the stuff!

We used to keep some of our bull calves and steers in Grandmother and Granddaddy's barn lot when we were weaning them. She tamed them for us by feeding them corn shucks. They LOVED that lady! She would shuck dozens of ears of corn and throw all the shucks over the fence. Soon, those calves would walk right up to you looking for food. We didn't even have to lift a finger.

Some of my favorite stories of Grandmother are the ones Jeremy tells from when he was growing up. Like the time he and Jason were riding with her, she hit a squirrel on the road and stopped to pick it up for supper! Or the time she was walking in the yard and a peacock tried to attack her from behind and she whipped around and smacked it with the stick she had in her hand before it could flog her.

The night we told Grandmother we were expecting our first baby, her first great-grandchild, was a special one. We handed her the ultrasound picture and she just stared at it. She looked at us and then looked at it. I'm not sure her brain would let her comprehend what we were trying to tell her. After we finally spelled it out, she was so excited. She so looked forward to being a great-grandmother.

Unfortunately, during my pregnancy, her health took a turn. She just couldn't get to feeling better. One night, she fell and they had to call Jeremy to help her get up. She didn't want to call an ambulance. We went down to her house and tried to figure out how to help her up without hurting her any more. At one point, I took her arm to steady her and she turned to me so fast and said, "Don't you pull on me, Kadie! Just get back. You can't be doing that." She was so scared that me helping her would hurt the baby. Every time I just tried to make sure she didn't bump her head or help Jeremy re position her, she would tell me not to touch her. If anything had happened to me or the baby as a result, she would have been more than devastated. She was determined to keep us safe even though she was the one who really needed help at the moment. We finally were able to get her up and in bed without anyone being hurt or calling the paramedics.

Though she lost alot of strength and felt bad much of the time, she was able to come to the hospital when Sassy Pants was born. They had a special bond. Sassy especially loved Grandmothers hands. She would stare at them and play with them. We would visit even when Grandmother didn't feel well and sit Sassy on the bed with her. They would both just grin and laugh. Grandmother always wanted to hold her and take care of her, but she just didn't have enough strength to hold a baby for long.

When Sassy Pants was a few months old, we found out Jeremy's brother and sister-in-law were expecting a baby. Again, Grandmother was over the moon. She had given us an embroidered quilt at our baby shower, and was determined to make her second great-grandchild one as well. The problem was, the days she felt sick outnumbered the days she felt well. Nonetheless, she worked hard to get it done. I went to visit her one day and asked how it was coming along. My heart broke as she began to cry thinking she didn't have enough time to finish it. That moment it was all I could do to keep it together. She knew she didn't have long, and she was worried. I tried to reassure her and told her I would help anyway I could. Thinking about it still makes my eyes well up with tears. However, the quilt did get finished for Cooper.

In late November 2015, when Sassy Pants was almost 9 months old, Grandmother went into the hospital for the last time. We visited her at the local hospital and took her a magnet with Sassy's fingerprints on it that said, "Get Well Soon!" We had a nice visit and felt positive about Grandmother getting better. We were wrong. The next day she was transferred to a bigger hospital and went into a coma like state where she didn't talk or even open her eyes. The whole family spent many hours in the waiting room because we knew the end was near. Our little girl was so good. She seemed to know something wasn't right and was so patient and quiet when she needed to be. It was like she just needed to be there with Grandmother and everyone else. She did the same at the funeral home after Grandmother passed. We took her up to the casket and she looked at Grandmother's hands and reached for her. She stuck close to Jeremy's for several days so concerned about him.

Grandmother never knew about Wild Man, but we know she would have loved him just as she loved her other great-grandchildren. When they play in the yard at what we call Grandmother Brown's house (Grandmother Doggett's parents' house) or work in the garden, we know she would love to watch them and be so happy they love to be outside enjoying the same places she did. We see her in Sassy's love of chickens, genuine love for people and the way she is so hard working. However, as much as everyone misses her, we have confidence that she knew and loved Jesus and is with Him in Heaven now. Every time I think of the song "When All of God's Singers Get Home" I think of her and know she truly is home.